Funny sardarji jokes

EMPLOYMENT
Our sardarji was filling up an application form for a job. He promptly filled the columns titled NAME,AGE,ADDRESS etc. Then he came to the column "Salary Expected" : He was not sure as to whatto be filled there. After much thought he wrote : Yes

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CROCODILE BOOTS
Sardarji proposes to a woman. She says yes if you bring me a pair ofcrocodile boots. He sets off to Africa and disappears. Finally a search is being made, they find him hunting crocodiles and watchhim killing a huge one . He walks over the reptile,checks its legs and angrily exclaims "71st and*again* barefeet!"
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A sardar goes into a store and sees a shiny object.He asks the clerk, "What is that shiny object?"The clerk replies, "That is a thermos flask."The sardar then asks, "What does it do?" The clerk responds, "It keeps hot things hot and it keeps cold things cold."The sardar says, "I'll take it!"The next day, he walks into work with his new thermos.His sardar boss sees him and asks,"What is that shiny object with you?"He said, "It's a thermos flask."The boss then says,"What does it do?" He replies, "It keeps hot things hotand cold things cold."The boss said, "Wow, what do you have in it?"The sardar replies, "Two cups of coffee and a coke."

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What will a Sardarji do after taking photocopies ?He will compare it with the original for spelling mistakes
What will a sardarji do if he wants an additional white sheet of paper ?(he already has one and he wants one more..)He takes a photcopy of the white paper !!!

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Once there was a meeting of all the Surd freedom fighters. They were planning for free Punjab. Santa Singh raised a point, "Oh.. we'llget Punjab from India but how would we develop it?"That was a difficult question indeed. Suddenly Banta Singh replied, "Noproblem! we'll attack USA, it would take over us and then we would be a state of USA and we'llautomatically get developed."All the surds became happy on this very simple solution but an old surd didnot utter a single word.Someone asked him why he wasn't happy.The surd replied, "OH! THAT'S ALRIGHT BUT...WHAT WOULD HAPPEN IFBY CHANCE WE TAKE OVER USA ?????"

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Sardar went to the appliance store sale and found a bargain. "I would like to buy this small TV," he told the salesman."Sorry, we don't sell to SARDARs," he replied.He hurried home removed his turban and changed his hair style, and returnedto tell the salesman"I would like to buy this TV.""Sorry, we don't sell to Sardars," Salesman replied."Damn, he recognized me," he thought. he went for a complete disguise thistime, haircut and new hair color, new outfit, big sunglasses, then waited a fewdays before he again approached the salesman."I would like to buy this TV.""Sorry, we don't sell to Sardars," he replied.Frustrated, he exclaimed "How do you know I'm a Sardar?""Because that's a microwave," he replied

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Q. How do you make a Sardar laugh on Saturday?
A. Tell him a joke on Wednesday.

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Why can't Sardars make ice cubes?
They always forget the recipe.

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Q. How did the Sardar try to kill the bird?
A. He threw it off a cliff.

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Q. What do you call 10 Sardars standing ear to ear?
A. A wind tunnel.

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Q. What do you see when you look into a Sardar's eyes?
A. The back of his head.

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Q. What do you call a sardar who drinks only beer?
A. Just-beer Singh ('T' silent!).


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Q. What do you call a sardar who has only one drink?
A. Just-one Singh. (again 'T' silent)

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Q. Why does Sardar always smile during lightning storms?
A. They think their picture is being taken.

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Q. Why does Sardar have "TGIF" written on their shoes?
A. Toes Go In First.
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Q. How can you tell when Sardar sends you a fax?
A. It has a stamp on it.

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Q. Why can't Sardar dial 911?
A. They can not find the eleven on the phone

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Q. How do you get Sardar on the roof?
A. Tell him the drinks are on the house.

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"Oh, look at the dead bird."Sardar looked skyward and said "Where, Where?

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Q. What do smart Sardar and UFOs have in common?
A. You always hear about them but you never see them.

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Q. Why does it take longer to build a Sardar snowman as opposed to a regularone?
A. You have to hollow out the head.

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TO LOSE WEIGHT..The doctor told Sardarji that if he ran eight kilometers a day for 300 days,he would loose 34 kilos.At the end of 300 days, Sardarji called the doctor to report he had lost theweight,but he had a problem."What's the problem?"asked the doctor."I'm 2400 kms from home."

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TRAIN TO LUDHIANA..Sardars Hari Singh and Gani Singh are in a railway station.Hari Singh asks the clerk: "Can I take this train to Ludhiana?""No," answers the Railway man."Can I?" asks Gani Singh.

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A sardarji goes to the see Jurassic Park and when the Dinosaurs startapproaching he is cowering in his seat when hisfriend asks him "kyon sardarji, kya baat hai? Dar kyon lag raha hai cinemahi to hai" Sardarji replies "Aadmi hoon aur akkal hai, pata hai ki cinema hai lekinvoh to janwar hai, usko kya pata "

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Sardarji is trying to commit suicide on the railway tracks and he takesalong some wine and chicken with him.Somebody stops him and asks "What are you doing with this stuff?"Sardarji replies "I dont want to die hungry in case the train is late."

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Sardarji got the 4th child. He fills data in the birth certificate"Mother: Sikh.Father: Sikh.Kid: Chinese."How come you write "Chinese" when both parents are Sikh?""Aah, Sardarji read a newspaper, it says that every 4th person born on theEarth now is a Chinese."

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Two dogs, Rubi and Moti, and a Sardarji were sent to the outer space.The ground control issues commands "Rubi!" "Woof!"(its the barking sound)"Press the red button." "Woof! Woof!" "Moti!""Woof!" "Press the white button." "Woof! Woof!""Sardarji!" "Woof.""Stop barking, feed the dogs and don't touch anything!"

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Sardarji is in Delhi. He is walking on a street which has a Clock Tower whensomeone asks him if he wants to buy the clock on the Tower. Sardarji says "Yes". "Give me a thousand rupees and I'll go get a ladder." The man took the thousand and disappeared. Having waited for several hours the Sardarji figured he was taken for aride. On the next day the Sardarji is again walking along the same street and thesame man asks him to buy the clock."Give me a thousand rupees and I'll go get a ladder."The Sardarji gives him the thousand and says "I am not a fool.This time, you wait and I'll go get a ladder."

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DOUBLE DECKER BUS RIDESanta Singh and Banta Singh landed up in Bombay. They managed to get into adouble-decker bus. Santa Singh somehow managed to get a bottom seat. But unfortunate Banta gotpushed to the top.After a while when the rush was over, Santa went upstairs to see friendBanta Singh. He met Banta in a bad condition clutching the seats in front with bothhands, scared to death.He says, "Arre Banta Singh ! What the heck's goin' on? Why are you so scared? I was enjoying my ride down there ?Scared Banta replies. "Yeah, but you'vegot a *driver.*"

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Santa Singh with two red ears went to his doctor. The doctor asked him whathad happened to his ears and he answered, "I was ironing a shirt and the phone rang - but instead of picking up thephone I accidentally picked up the iron and stuckit to my ear.""Oh Dear!" the doctor exclaimed in disbelief. "But ..what happened to yourother ear?""The scoundrel called back."